Remembering our Younger Selves and Divorce.
I have this picture of myself placed strategically in my office that was taken by a photographer for the town newspaper where I grew up in Ojai back when I was 17 and running cross-country my senior year in high school. Despite it being taken nearly 40 years ago, I...
Capital Gains, the Family Home and Divorce Mediation.
When couples mediate they have lots of options to consider when addressing what will happen with the family home. If the issue is litigated the options are usually for one spouse to buy out the other one through a refinance or that the house be sold. Sometimes these...
Cohabitation, Spousal Support and Divorce Mediation.
In a previous blog I tackled the subject of how long couples can expect spousal support to last upon the conclusion of their divorce. One of the considerations mentioned at that time was the impact of cohabitation on one’s right to continue receiving support and the...
The Case for Kindness in Divorce.
Kindness is the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate. When people think of divorce they don’t typically think of two people coming together and being friendly, generous and considerate to one another. To the contrary, a more typical expectation is...
The Days Between: Epstein, Watts and Divorce Mediation
For Grateful Dead fans there is this time period called “Days Between” which is the stretch between August 1st when Jerry Garcia, one of the band’s founding members, was born (8/1/42) and August 9th, when he died (8/9/95). “Days Between” also happens to be one of...
Trust and Divorce Mediation.
With Divorce Mediation there are two big steps that need to be taken to prepare a couple to be in a place to make the important and lasting decisions they will need to make in their divorce. The first part is getting educated on the law and the issues. It is...
Divorce Mediation and the Preservation of Relationships
Divorce poses the very unique challenge of finding a practical way to bring the marriage to an end while keeping an eye to preserving all the other important relationships that have grown over time from the intersection of the worlds of the two spouses. Finding a way...
Making Sure Divorce is the Answer
By the time couples are sitting across from me for their Divorce Mediation there is a pretty strong assumption that a final decision has been made by one or both spouses that their marriage is over and that the divorce will be moving forward. I am a very strong...
How Long Does Spousal Support Last?
One very important and challenging issue in divorce is figuring out how the family finances will be handled once the couple has separated. When children are involved the management of the children’s needs is addressed through child support. Whether or not there are...
Divorce and Lessons About Letting Go From a Cat.
There is a lot to grapple with when you decide to divorce. There is anger, frustration, disappointment, fear of what lies ahead, and often an overwhelming sense of failure. These feelings can be paralyzing and can get in the way of moving forward and making sound...