Positivity, Appreciation and Divorce.
When the walls are closing in and the world is crashing down, one of the hardest things for us to do is to find anything positive in all of it. It is human nature to have our failings bring us down and put us in a negative place. I have certainly had difficulties in...
Maintaining Control and Divorce
There are many different emotions that we experience heading into a divorce. A couple of big ones are the sense of losing control and the fear of the unknown and unexpected. We are afraid of being unfairly treated and taken advantage of. We have never done this...
Fault and Divorce.
The issue of “no fault” divorce has become a recent topic of interest on the national stage. There has been talk of certain conservative states walking back their “no-fault” divorce policies and reinstituting a requirement for a spouse seeking a divorce to show that...
What About a Postnup Instead of a Divorce?
Usually by the time couples have come to see me at least one has already firmly decided they want a divorce. Every once in a while I will hear things from one or both spouses that give reason to pause, and explore if there are other options available to avoid a...
Why Not Guideline Spousal Support?
I have written blogs in the past about how the Court addresses the issues of child support and spousal support. For the issue of child support in California, we have an algebraic formula set forth in Family Code section 4055. The Court is largely mandated to order...
Remembering our Younger Selves and Divorce.
I have this picture of myself placed strategically in my office that was taken by a photographer for the town newspaper where I grew up in Ojai back when I was 17 and running cross-country my senior year in high school. Despite it being taken nearly 40 years ago, I...
Hurry up, it’s June and Divorce.
No, I am not trying to hurry anyone into getting divorced. This is a big decision and any couple considering divorce should first explore the various options available to avoid it altogether. We are just now entering mid-June and couples who are ready to move...
When Not to Mediate Your Divorce.
Ever since I took my very first divorce mediation training course back in 2003 I have tried to do my part in educating the public on what should be the standard way to get divorced. Why wouldn’t couples first choose to attempt to sort out their divorce issues in a...
Getting Your Spouse to Consider Divorce Mediation
When a couple decides they are getting a divorce, or when either spouse begins to feel like it could be an option, it is quite easy for each of them to contact their own divorce attorney and schedule a consultation to have their initial questions answered and to come...
The Dead, Transition and Divorce.
This past weekend I had the opportunity to spend three nights at the Sphere in Las Vegas, enjoying the latest rendition of the Grateful Dead, Dead & Company. Back in the 1990’s a group of my friends and I would descend on Las Vegas each year to see a weekend...